Best Self Care Quotes, Attributed and Sorted by Use

If you’re like me, you go looking for a self care quote on exactly the kind of day you don’t have the energy to check who actually said it.

So I did the checking for you.

Every line below is traced to a real book, essay, speech or post, and the few famous ones that turned out to be unsourced have their own honest little section at the end.

They’re sorted by the moment you’ll want them for, because “self care” on a hard Tuesday and “self care” when you feel guilty for sitting down are two different needs.

For a Hard Day

“Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including you.” Anne Lamott, from a 2015 Facebook post, later collected in her book Almost Everything (2018).

“A moment of self-compassion can change your entire day. A string of such moments can change the course of your life.” Christopher Germer, The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion (2009).

“It is a common experience that a problem difficult at night is resolved in the morning after the committee of sleep has worked on it.” John Steinbeck, Sweet Thursday (1954).

“Nowhere can man find a quieter or more untroubled retreat than in his own soul.” Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Book 4, in the George Long translation.

“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.” Jack Kornfield, Buddha’s Little Instruction Book (1994).

The Steinbeck one is the line I actually use, mostly because “the committee of sleep” is the only committee I’ve ever trusted.

For Saying No Without the Guilt

“No is a complete sentence.” Anonymous, in print since a 1958 Cincinnati Post column, and made famous by Anne Lamott, who put it in the mouth of a friend in Plan B (2005).

“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.” Brené Brown, from a December 2013 piece she wrote for HuffPost on setting boundaries.

“Saying ‘no’ does not always show a lack of generosity, and saying ‘yes’ is not always a virtue.” Paulo Coelho, Manuscript Found in Accra (2012).

“Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously.” Prentis Hemphill, therapist and writer, from a widely shared 2021 social media post.

I’ve written before about learning to say no, and the Hemphill line is the one I wish I’d had back then.

If the thing you struggle with is the explaining that comes after the no, there’s a whole post of i don’t owe anyone an explanation quotes for that exact problem.

For Rest and Sleep

“Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.” Ovid, Ars Amatoria, Book II, line 351, in one common translation.

“Rest is not a luxury, a privilege, or a bonus we must wait for once we are burned out.” Tricia Hersey, Rest Is Resistance (2022).

“Every person needs to take one day away. A day in which one consciously separates the past from the future.” Maya Angelou, Wouldn’t Take Nothing for My Journey Now (1993).

“One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.” Virginia Woolf, A Room of One’s Own (1929).

The Ovid line was originally advice to a lover about giving the beloved a break, which somehow makes it better.

And if sitting still is the part you find hardest, I’ve been there, and wrote about reviving the lost art of sitting still as a kind of confession.

For Your Body

“Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.” Jim Rohn, The Treasury of Quotes (1994).

“and i said to my body. softly. ‘i want to be your friend.’ it took a long breath. and replied ‘i have been waiting my whole life for this.'” Nayyirah Waheed, from her poem “three” in salt. (2013).

“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” Oscar Wilde, spoken by Lord Goring in An Ideal Husband (1895).

The Waheed poem is the one that made me put the phone down and go for a walk, which I think is the point of the whole genre.

For When Resting Feels Selfish

“Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.” Audre Lorde, A Burst of Light (1988), written while she was living with cancer.

“Self-care is never a selfish act. It is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others.” Parker Palmer, Let Your Life Speak (2000).

“Compassion for others begins with kindness to ourselves.” Pema Chödrön, Start Where You Are (1994).

“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” Sharon Salzberg, Lovingkindness (1995), and not the Buddha, who gets credited for it all over the internet.

“True self-care is not salt baths and chocolate cake, it is making the choice to build a life you don’t need to regularly escape from.” Brianna Wiest, from a Thought Catalog essay that went viral in 2017.

The Lorde quote is the one people reach for most, and it helps to know it came from a woman fighting for her life, not from a brand selling bath salts.

Short Ones for Captions

“Rest is resistance.” Tricia Hersey, the title of her 2022 book and the motto of her Nap Ministry.

“The committee of sleep.” John Steinbeck, Sweet Thursday (1954).

“Unplug it for a few minutes, including you.” Anne Lamott, 2015.

“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.” Jack Kornfield, 1994.

“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” Oscar Wilde, 1895.

The Famous Ones I Couldn’t Verify

“Self-care is giving the world the best of you, instead of what’s left of you.” This is credited everywhere to a Katie Reed, but I couldn’t find an original post, book or interview, so I can’t tell you who she is or whether she said it.

“You cannot serve from an empty vessel.” Credited to an Eleanor Brownn, sometimes spelled Brown, with no traceable source anywhere, which usually means a quote-site invention.

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt since 1940, but the Quote Investigator site found no record of her writing those exact words, only a looser 1935 remark with the same idea.

I’d still use the Roosevelt one, honestly, but I’d say “attributed to” and sleep fine.

And Remember

None of these people were talking about face masks or scented candles.

Lorde was ill, Lamott was overwhelmed, Hersey was exhausted, and Woolf was annoyed about a bad college dinner.

Self care, in their hands, means the plain stuff: sleep, food, a day off, a no, and a little kindness pointed inward.

You already have all of those available to you, which is the quiet good news hiding inside every quote on this page.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the most famous self care quote? Probably Audre Lorde’s line that caring for herself “is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.” It comes from her 1988 book A Burst of Light, written while she was living with cancer.

Did the Buddha say “you yourself deserve your love and affection”? No. The line was written by meditation teacher Sharon Salzberg in her 1995 book Lovingkindness, and later got misattributed to the Buddha online.

Who said “no is a complete sentence”? Nobody famous, originally. It appears in a 1958 newspaper column as an anonymous desk sign, and Anne Lamott popularised it in her 2005 book Plan B.

What is a short self care quote for Instagram? “Rest is resistance,” from Tricia Hersey, or Oscar Wilde’s “To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” Both are short and both are real.

Are self care quotes actually useful? They work as a nudge, not a cure. The useful part is noticing which line you reach for, because it usually tells you what you’re short on, whether that’s sleep, a boundary, or permission.

Why do so many self care quotes have the wrong author? Quote sites copy from each other without checking, so one mistake spreads to hundreds of pages. Checking against a book, interview or a source like Quote Investigator is the only fix.